When I was still in grade school, I saw how my sisters had plenty of friends. It was for this reason that I envied my sisters. I always thought, “Wow. They have so much friends. And I have no friends such as theirs.” I always wondered then when will I find friends, true friends. Or if I will even have one.
Being an introvert, I used to think it was a curse that’s why I didn’t have many friends. In sixth grade, I only considered 4 other people as friends. Others were just “people I am in good terms with”. Not friends, not enemies either. Just people I am in good terms. Although, I no longer very much keep in touch with the three (out of the four) of these people I considered friends. Thinking about it now, I wonder why they only seem like distant memories . Nothing that I will hold on until I grow old. Perhaps, they weren’t really friends at all. Perhaps, like the rest of the people, I was only “in good terms” with them because we used to hang out a lot with each other. This realization is making me doubt about my current friends. We hang out a lot but are they really friends for life? Or just like the others, are they going to be just passing memories? I do not like to think of it that way. I would like them to be real friends to me in a way that they will also consider me their true friend.
I have only a few friends, not so many like my sisters. But I am an introvert and that makes me allow only a few people into my circle. It’s not a curse, it’s a blessing because these are the people I can be really real with. To the people I consider my friends (you would know who you are), if you are able to read this, I want to let you guys know that even though I’m not very expressive in person, I appreciate the friendship. And thnks fr th mmrs. (See what I did there?)