Midnight thoughts and realizations as I finish my reflection paper for Philo 1…
After reading through the concept of free will and determinism, I have come to realize that we are not truly free. In all of our decisions or actions, may it be big or small, it seems as though these are determined. They say “free will” is a necessary condition for being morally responsible for our actions. When most of us, if not all, act on certain things, we think about the consequences. If we are truly free, should we not think or even care about the consequences? Shouldn’t we just freely do whatever the hell we want? But what we want or what we decide what we want is also something that is determined. For example, me simply choosing between hotdog and pork chop for breakfast is a determined decision. It is determined in the sense that I have been wanting to eat hotdog and that I don’t think pork chop is a breakfast meal. It may feel and look as if I chose freely but the decision was determined by those factors. Yet, I am conflicted by this realization. If we live deterministic lives, then it must mean that all our fates are sealed. So what is the point then? Doesn’t it seem like we are just mere characters in a Sims game?
I keep coming back to the thought that perhaps, we are just pawns, puppets of an elaborate cosmic joke, fooling us that we are superior beings capable of thinking, deciding, and acting for ourselves.
It’s 1 a.m. where I am, and my mind is a little messy. And to be honest, this scares me.